ActivityPub Viewer

A small tool to view real-world ActivityPub objects as JSON! Enter a URL or username from Mastodon or a similar service below, and we'll send a request with the right Accept header to the server to view the underlying object.

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{ "@context": "https://www.w3.org/ns/activitystreams", "type": "OrderedCollectionPage", "orderedItems": [ { "type": "Create", "actor": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526", "object": { "type": "Note", "id": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526/entities/urn:activity:933188921799344128", "attributedTo": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526", "content": "SHADES OF MISSY<br />The Image of the Mistress stepping slowly across the training room floor towards the helpless and frightened new recruit has been in my mind for many years now. Often this is how a story starts - with one strong image of a character and setting. This leads the imagination into the realms of the new story.<br />Over the years other strong images of Missy and her MadHouse came to me. I collected these images lovingly - sometimes writing scenes for them - but I never told anyone about Missy or this story idea.<br />I honestly believed a tale of an emotionally locked up Madam and the adventures of her workers was far too confrontational to ever be published. But like my gender fluid, male/female nature, Missy refused to be ignored.<br /><br />Missy and her MadHouse were never far away. She intruded into my dreams and fantasies, almost building herself without need of my imagination or help.<br /><br />It wasn't until I began writing explicit sex back in February 2018 that Missy began screaming to get out. I was confined by the restrictions of heterosexuality as well as some other social stigmas and when I wondered how to write a story that represented every minority that Missy began to whisper.<br />Her Nordic looks and snappy fashion sense were cemented in my mind. But where did this idea of an ice cold queen come from?<br /><br />One of the first inspirational women was sub zero Nell. She had the look, not just physically but in her fashion choices. Her image, her reputation as an ice queen is everything and gained so much clout she was able to terrify other lawyers and business people. Sub zero Nell and her cold, dismissive manner are certainly a shade of Missy. Her professional image.<br /><br />Balalaika from the 'Black Lagoon' anime was next. The pale hair and icy blue eyes made me think of Missy immediately. The cut of her suit and her calm, calculated steps enhanced the image of Missy further. Truly though the cementing factor was her attitude. Balalaika is brutal. An ex soldier with an army of loyal comrades this woman kills at will and has no care for the damage she creates. This is the worst of Missy's traits.<br /><br />Imagine my surprise when I started watching 'American Horror Story' some months ago and stumbled on to Elsa Mars - who wears a blue suit for her performances. I had not ever seen this character before but her passion for collecting freaks (and her careless use of them) struck me as a very strong parallel with Missy. The fact that she herself is damaged only enhances her connection with my Missy.<br /><br />As we progress through the 13 books of the series you will learn more about Missy. I am not trying to suggest there is any excuse for this type of damaging behaviour, but I do plan to show a clear path as to how Missy became the way she is. She has compassion that most of her workers would not believe, were they aware of it, and hides it as she considers it to be an intolerable crack in her unbreakable exterior.<br /><br />Even though each of the 13 novels means a happy ending for someone, the entire series is based around Missy and her journey through love and acceptance of herself and the things she has done.<br />Make no mistake, Missy's tale is incredibly sad. She will find love. She will find herself. It is up to you to decide if the cost is worth it.", "to": [ "https://www.w3.org/ns/activitystreams#Public" ], "cc": [ "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526/followers" ], "tag": [], "url": "https://www.minds.com/newsfeed/933188921799344128", "published": "2019-01-19T02:39:36+00:00", "source": { "content": "SHADES OF MISSY\nThe Image of the Mistress stepping slowly across the training room floor towards the helpless and frightened new recruit has been in my mind for many years now. Often this is how a story starts - with one strong image of a character and setting. This leads the imagination into the realms of the new story.\nOver the years other strong images of Missy and her MadHouse came to me. I collected these images lovingly - sometimes writing scenes for them - but I never told anyone about Missy or this story idea.\nI honestly believed a tale of an emotionally locked up Madam and the adventures of her workers was far too confrontational to ever be published. But like my gender fluid, male/female nature, Missy refused to be ignored.\n\nMissy and her MadHouse were never far away. She intruded into my dreams and fantasies, almost building herself without need of my imagination or help.\n\nIt wasn't until I began writing explicit sex back in February 2018 that Missy began screaming to get out. I was confined by the restrictions of heterosexuality as well as some other social stigmas and when I wondered how to write a story that represented every minority that Missy began to whisper.\nHer Nordic looks and snappy fashion sense were cemented in my mind. But where did this idea of an ice cold queen come from?\n\nOne of the first inspirational women was sub zero Nell. She had the look, not just physically but in her fashion choices. Her image, her reputation as an ice queen is everything and gained so much clout she was able to terrify other lawyers and business people. Sub zero Nell and her cold, dismissive manner are certainly a shade of Missy. Her professional image.\n\nBalalaika from the 'Black Lagoon' anime was next. The pale hair and icy blue eyes made me think of Missy immediately. The cut of her suit and her calm, calculated steps enhanced the image of Missy further. Truly though the cementing factor was her attitude. Balalaika is brutal. An ex soldier with an army of loyal comrades this woman kills at will and has no care for the damage she creates. This is the worst of Missy's traits.\n\nImagine my surprise when I started watching 'American Horror Story' some months ago and stumbled on to Elsa Mars - who wears a blue suit for her performances. I had not ever seen this character before but her passion for collecting freaks (and her careless use of them) struck me as a very strong parallel with Missy. The fact that she herself is damaged only enhances her connection with my Missy.\n\nAs we progress through the 13 books of the series you will learn more about Missy. I am not trying to suggest there is any excuse for this type of damaging behaviour, but I do plan to show a clear path as to how Missy became the way she is. She has compassion that most of her workers would not believe, were they aware of it, and hides it as she considers it to be an intolerable crack in her unbreakable exterior.\n\nEven though each of the 13 novels means a happy ending for someone, the entire series is based around Missy and her journey through love and acceptance of herself and the things she has done.\nMake no mistake, Missy's tale is incredibly sad. She will find love. She will find herself. It is up to you to decide if the cost is worth it.", "mediaType": "text/plain" } }, "id": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526/entities/urn:activity:933188921799344128/activity" }, { "type": "Create", "actor": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526", "object": { "type": "Note", "id": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526/entities/urn:activity:932256427190071296", "attributedTo": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526", "content": "<a href=\"https://www.minds.com/newsfeed/932256427190071296\" target=\"_blank\">https://www.minds.com/newsfeed/932256427190071296</a>", "to": [ "https://www.w3.org/ns/activitystreams#Public" ], "cc": [ "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526/followers" ], "tag": [], "url": "https://www.minds.com/newsfeed/932256427190071296", "published": "2019-01-16T12:54:12+00:00", "source": { "content": "https://www.minds.com/newsfeed/932256427190071296", "mediaType": "text/plain" } }, "id": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526/entities/urn:activity:932256427190071296/activity" }, { "type": "Create", "actor": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526", "object": { "type": "Note", "id": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526/entities/urn:activity:931720787305877504", "attributedTo": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526", "content": "If she allows you to dominate her sexually NEVER try to dominate her mind. Never appraise or judge her mood, conduct or behaviour. Once you see the power of the gift she can - and will willingly, joyfully - give, you must respect her in all other ways or she cannot give the gift of her body with pure heart.<br />So lies the dark left hand of tantra ", "to": [ "https://www.w3.org/ns/activitystreams#Public" ], "cc": [ "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526/followers" ], "tag": [], "url": "https://www.minds.com/newsfeed/931720787305877504", "published": "2019-01-15T01:25:46+00:00", "source": { "content": "If she allows you to dominate her sexually NEVER try to dominate her mind. Never appraise or judge her mood, conduct or behaviour. Once you see the power of the gift she can - and will willingly, joyfully - give, you must respect her in all other ways or she cannot give the gift of her body with pure heart.\nSo lies the dark left hand of tantra ", "mediaType": "text/plain" } }, "id": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526/entities/urn:activity:931720787305877504/activity" }, { "type": "Create", "actor": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526", "object": { "type": "Note", "id": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526/entities/urn:activity:931720358060052480", "attributedTo": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526", "content": "<a href=\"https://www.minds.com/newsfeed/931720358060052480\" target=\"_blank\">https://www.minds.com/newsfeed/931720358060052480</a>", "to": [ "https://www.w3.org/ns/activitystreams#Public" ], "cc": [ "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526/followers", "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/614198139255005203" ], "tag": [], "url": "https://www.minds.com/newsfeed/931720358060052480", "published": "2019-01-15T01:24:03+00:00", "inReplyTo": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/614198139255005203/entities/urn:activity:931698123176226816", "source": { "content": "https://www.minds.com/newsfeed/931720358060052480", "mediaType": "text/plain" } }, "id": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526/entities/urn:activity:931720358060052480/activity" }, { "type": "Create", "actor": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526", "object": { "type": "Note", "id": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526/entities/urn:activity:926959729317306368", "attributedTo": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526", "content": "I never thought it was a good idea to hand my sanity over to anyone. I gave it to him once and he brutalised it. Destroyed me. So I had to make a new me. A new world. I couldn't live as the other person anymore.<br /><br />Time went by and he changed. Don't look at me like that - he actually did. Changed conduct, changed behaviour, changed physically. He really did change.<br /><br />I was so frightened. It took months before I was comfortable around him but he proved time and time again - this is real. I would never hurt you.<br /><br />Maybe I just wanted to believe it too badly. Its not that I didn't see the warning signs its that I took them in good faith - process takes time. Nobodys perfect. Did I imagine that under the love and care the weapon was cocked and loaded? Yes I did. Doubt is part of trust after all. <br /><br />But I kept on. Every day so much happier, more free, truly stepping forward into a world I could never have imagined. Far more exciting than any I had seen before. <br /><br />I did not just give my sanity, my physical and mental energy. I gave gifts I swore no one could take - not even by force. Yet I gave them. Willingly. Under an accord.<br /><br />Now the accord is broken I see the truth. I can't fight this. Every single time I have been in this position it has been for the same reason.<br /><br />My grief that he could not see me as I truly am.<br /><br />Sanity is not something I understand right now.<br /><br />This is the third time I've stood at the gates for this pain.<br /><br />To my haters : I got it, don't you worry. I'm suffering. Have a lovely day and a wonderful life", "to": [ "https://www.w3.org/ns/activitystreams#Public" ], "cc": [ "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526/followers" ], "tag": [], "url": "https://www.minds.com/newsfeed/926959729317306368", "published": "2019-01-01T22:07:01+00:00", "source": { "content": "I never thought it was a good idea to hand my sanity over to anyone. I gave it to him once and he brutalised it. Destroyed me. So I had to make a new me. A new world. I couldn't live as the other person anymore.\n\nTime went by and he changed. Don't look at me like that - he actually did. Changed conduct, changed behaviour, changed physically. He really did change.\n\nI was so frightened. It took months before I was comfortable around him but he proved time and time again - this is real. I would never hurt you.\n\nMaybe I just wanted to believe it too badly. Its not that I didn't see the warning signs its that I took them in good faith - process takes time. Nobodys perfect. Did I imagine that under the love and care the weapon was cocked and loaded? Yes I did. Doubt is part of trust after all. \n\nBut I kept on. Every day so much happier, more free, truly stepping forward into a world I could never have imagined. Far more exciting than any I had seen before. \n\nI did not just give my sanity, my physical and mental energy. I gave gifts I swore no one could take - not even by force. Yet I gave them. Willingly. Under an accord.\n\nNow the accord is broken I see the truth. I can't fight this. Every single time I have been in this position it has been for the same reason.\n\nMy grief that he could not see me as I truly am.\n\nSanity is not something I understand right now.\n\nThis is the third time I've stood at the gates for this pain.\n\nTo my haters : I got it, don't you worry. I'm suffering. Have a lovely day and a wonderful life", "mediaType": "text/plain" } }, "id": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526/entities/urn:activity:926959729317306368/activity" }, { "type": "Create", "actor": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526", "object": { "type": "Note", "id": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526/entities/urn:activity:926377827838357504", "attributedTo": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526", "content": "A teaser from the second book of my series, 'Ordinary Things'<br /><br /><br />CHAPTER ONE<br />CHERRY<br /><br />The softly whispering air through the vents is the only sound as I eye the drawer full of strap ons.<br />I’m in the training stage, behind the desk. Missy is leaning against it, like she did for my trial—like she does for all of them—and a potential new recruit sits in the hard metal chair.<br /><br />In the month I’ve been here I’ve undertaken a few initial tests. The others think Missy might be favouring me. Its that fact making me hesitate over the strap ons.<br /><br />I know Missy would prefer me to use the largest one. It has a hefty double wearers reward. Even after tons of practice and kundalini work, I still don’t like it up the butt.<br /><br />I want to impress Missy. But I also want to be comfortable. <br /><br />I take a second to grin at the poor scraggy street hoe. Her blue eyes are big and wide, face white with anxiety. She keeps looking between me and Missy, wondering what the fucks going on. Her long blonde hair is very pale and clean. At her feet a tattered backpack takes the thumps from her kicking toes.<br />Fuck it. I’m taking the pink one with a single reward. It’s a nice size. Besides, Missy’s started tapping her finger on her arm. That means hurry the fuck up. <br /><br />I pull up my skirt and place one foot on the desk as I lift the device from the drawer. I’m only wearing a loose, black dress. Like Harry did for my trial, I grabbed something convenient and came running to Missy’s call barefoot. <br /><br />This floor is a stage. Our body language is our biggest prop.<br /><br />Little blondie gasps and her poor eyes almost pop from her head as I pull out the strap on. I give her steady eye contact in return as I position it and tie it on. I give it a slight wiggle and close my eyes as I feel it shift deep inside me.<br /><br />Trust me, you really want to make sure your strap on is tied correctly and fully comfortable before you start slamming the fuck out of anyone. My first time I was so keen to impress Missy I rushed it and ended up bruising my cervix. Not fun.<br /><br />I walk slowly around the table, letting blondie take it in. Her eyes get bigger as I step closer. She looks at Missy and back at me. <br /><br />“Hey there,” I say, trying to sound friendly. “This is your first test. Any problems just say ‘enough’ and I stop. Okay?”<br /><br />She looks at my strap on and back at my face again. <br /><br />“Okay.”<br /><br />I allow myself the luxury of a slow sigh, closing my eyes briefly. I can relate to her position, but I know have a right to my confidence. My superiority. I’ve performed five first tests now, including this one.<br />Each and every one has tapped out before I could start really fucking them. <br /><br />I now realize how rare my reaction was—that I have a mental ability to adapt to my circumstance. Its something all of us here at the MadHouse share.<br /><br />I step closer to blondie and lean in, touching her lips with mine. She sighs, opening up and tilting her head back. I can feel her grin as the kiss deepens. She’s responding well. I might actually get to thrash this one. <br /><br />As I straighten up I grab her shoulders and pull her to her feet. With a twist I fling her at the desk. My body is ridiculously strong now, stronger than I ever thought it could be, and the move is easy. Blondie doesn’t weigh much either.<br /><br />She lets out a little ‘ohf’ as she thumps across the wood next to Missy. I push her skirt up with one hand and rock my hips towards her, letting her feel the strap on.<br /><br />“Enough! Shit! What the fuck!” Blondie screams. I step back with a frown.<br /><br />“Aww…” I can’t help but be a bit disappointed.<br /><br />“Don’t pout Cherry.”<br /><br />“Yes, Mistress.” I am instantly back to my best behaviour, attentive stance, lowered eyes.<br /><br />We are all submissive to her, truly and at all times. She is our Mistress.<br /><br />Blondie stands up, looking frantic. She looks between me and Missy. <br /><br />“What is this?” She asks.<br /><br />Missy has not bothered to change her expression.<br /><br />“I said, you would be tested.” <br /><br />“But what the fuck?”<br /><br />Missy shrugs. “You want to be a whore. What sort of test do you think it was going to be?”<br /><br />“I don’t – I mean – Shit! You people are all fucking mad!”<br /><br />Missy sighs, looking up at blondie with true annoyance. It must be so, for she has forced herself to frown. Dangerous territory.<br /><br />“That’s what it says on the door sweet cheeks. Now get the fuck out.”<br /><br />Blondie picks up her bag. She stares at us both. Missy glares, her complete lack of emotion emanating as pure ice. The way she stares at blondie, its like nothing is there. The way most people look at the sky. It never stops being unnerving, even when she’s doing it to someone else. <br /><br />Blondie tries to appeal to me. It even works a bit—she’s got tears starting to run down her face and she’s shivering. Her imploring eyes really do cut me.<br /><br />I grin mischievously and wiggle my hips so the strap on bobs up and down and side to side. Blondie’s eyes go wide and her face streaks even whiter. She bolts for the lift.<br /><br />Missy has already gone back to swiping at the tablet. <br /><br />“You can go Cherry.”<br /><br />“Thank you, Mistress.”<br />", "to": [ "https://www.w3.org/ns/activitystreams#Public" ], "cc": [ "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526/followers" ], "tag": [], "url": "https://www.minds.com/newsfeed/926377827838357504", "published": "2018-12-31T07:34:45+00:00", "source": { "content": "A teaser from the second book of my series, 'Ordinary Things'\n\n\nCHAPTER ONE\nCHERRY\n\nThe softly whispering air through the vents is the only sound as I eye the drawer full of strap ons.\nI’m in the training stage, behind the desk. Missy is leaning against it, like she did for my trial—like she does for all of them—and a potential new recruit sits in the hard metal chair.\n\nIn the month I’ve been here I’ve undertaken a few initial tests. The others think Missy might be favouring me. Its that fact making me hesitate over the strap ons.\n\nI know Missy would prefer me to use the largest one. It has a hefty double wearers reward. Even after tons of practice and kundalini work, I still don’t like it up the butt.\n\nI want to impress Missy. But I also want to be comfortable. \n\nI take a second to grin at the poor scraggy street hoe. Her blue eyes are big and wide, face white with anxiety. She keeps looking between me and Missy, wondering what the fucks going on. Her long blonde hair is very pale and clean. At her feet a tattered backpack takes the thumps from her kicking toes.\nFuck it. I’m taking the pink one with a single reward. It’s a nice size. Besides, Missy’s started tapping her finger on her arm. That means hurry the fuck up. \n\nI pull up my skirt and place one foot on the desk as I lift the device from the drawer. I’m only wearing a loose, black dress. Like Harry did for my trial, I grabbed something convenient and came running to Missy’s call barefoot. \n\nThis floor is a stage. Our body language is our biggest prop.\n\nLittle blondie gasps and her poor eyes almost pop from her head as I pull out the strap on. I give her steady eye contact in return as I position it and tie it on. I give it a slight wiggle and close my eyes as I feel it shift deep inside me.\n\nTrust me, you really want to make sure your strap on is tied correctly and fully comfortable before you start slamming the fuck out of anyone. My first time I was so keen to impress Missy I rushed it and ended up bruising my cervix. Not fun.\n\nI walk slowly around the table, letting blondie take it in. Her eyes get bigger as I step closer. She looks at Missy and back at me. \n\n“Hey there,” I say, trying to sound friendly. “This is your first test. Any problems just say ‘enough’ and I stop. Okay?”\n\nShe looks at my strap on and back at my face again. \n\n“Okay.”\n\nI allow myself the luxury of a slow sigh, closing my eyes briefly. I can relate to her position, but I know have a right to my confidence. My superiority. I’ve performed five first tests now, including this one.\nEach and every one has tapped out before I could start really fucking them. \n\nI now realize how rare my reaction was—that I have a mental ability to adapt to my circumstance. Its something all of us here at the MadHouse share.\n\nI step closer to blondie and lean in, touching her lips with mine. She sighs, opening up and tilting her head back. I can feel her grin as the kiss deepens. She’s responding well. I might actually get to thrash this one. \n\nAs I straighten up I grab her shoulders and pull her to her feet. With a twist I fling her at the desk. My body is ridiculously strong now, stronger than I ever thought it could be, and the move is easy. Blondie doesn’t weigh much either.\n\nShe lets out a little ‘ohf’ as she thumps across the wood next to Missy. I push her skirt up with one hand and rock my hips towards her, letting her feel the strap on.\n\n“Enough! Shit! What the fuck!” Blondie screams. I step back with a frown.\n\n“Aww…” I can’t help but be a bit disappointed.\n\n“Don’t pout Cherry.”\n\n“Yes, Mistress.” I am instantly back to my best behaviour, attentive stance, lowered eyes.\n\nWe are all submissive to her, truly and at all times. She is our Mistress.\n\nBlondie stands up, looking frantic. She looks between me and Missy. \n\n“What is this?” She asks.\n\nMissy has not bothered to change her expression.\n\n“I said, you would be tested.” \n\n“But what the fuck?”\n\nMissy shrugs. “You want to be a whore. What sort of test do you think it was going to be?”\n\n“I don’t – I mean – Shit! You people are all fucking mad!”\n\nMissy sighs, looking up at blondie with true annoyance. It must be so, for she has forced herself to frown. Dangerous territory.\n\n“That’s what it says on the door sweet cheeks. Now get the fuck out.”\n\nBlondie picks up her bag. She stares at us both. Missy glares, her complete lack of emotion emanating as pure ice. The way she stares at blondie, its like nothing is there. The way most people look at the sky. It never stops being unnerving, even when she’s doing it to someone else. \n\nBlondie tries to appeal to me. It even works a bit—she’s got tears starting to run down her face and she’s shivering. Her imploring eyes really do cut me.\n\nI grin mischievously and wiggle my hips so the strap on bobs up and down and side to side. Blondie’s eyes go wide and her face streaks even whiter. She bolts for the lift.\n\nMissy has already gone back to swiping at the tablet. \n\n“You can go Cherry.”\n\n“Thank you, Mistress.”\n", "mediaType": "text/plain" } }, "id": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526/entities/urn:activity:926377827838357504/activity" }, { "type": "Create", "actor": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526", "object": { "type": "Note", "id": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526/entities/urn:activity:926135081755885568", "attributedTo": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526", "content": "<a href=\"https://www.minds.com/newsfeed/926135081755885568\" target=\"_blank\">https://www.minds.com/newsfeed/926135081755885568</a>", "to": [ "https://www.w3.org/ns/activitystreams#Public" ], "cc": [ "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526/followers" ], "tag": [], "url": "https://www.minds.com/newsfeed/926135081755885568", "published": "2018-12-30T15:30:10+00:00", "source": { "content": "https://www.minds.com/newsfeed/926135081755885568", "mediaType": "text/plain" } }, "id": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526/entities/urn:activity:926135081755885568/activity" }, { "type": "Create", "actor": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526", "object": { "type": "Note", "id": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526/entities/urn:activity:926134935492390912", "attributedTo": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526", "content": "<a href=\"https://www.minds.com/newsfeed/926134935492390912\" target=\"_blank\">https://www.minds.com/newsfeed/926134935492390912</a>", "to": [ "https://www.w3.org/ns/activitystreams#Public" ], "cc": [ "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526/followers" ], "tag": [], "url": "https://www.minds.com/newsfeed/926134935492390912", "published": "2018-12-30T15:29:35+00:00", "source": { "content": "https://www.minds.com/newsfeed/926134935492390912", "mediaType": "text/plain" } }, "id": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526/entities/urn:activity:926134935492390912/activity" }, { "type": "Create", "actor": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526", "object": { "type": "Note", "id": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526/entities/urn:activity:926134838690697216", "attributedTo": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526", "content": "<a href=\"https://www.minds.com/newsfeed/926134838690697216\" target=\"_blank\">https://www.minds.com/newsfeed/926134838690697216</a>", "to": [ "https://www.w3.org/ns/activitystreams#Public" ], "cc": [ "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526/followers" ], "tag": [], "url": "https://www.minds.com/newsfeed/926134838690697216", "published": "2018-12-30T15:29:12+00:00", "source": { "content": "https://www.minds.com/newsfeed/926134838690697216", "mediaType": "text/plain" } }, "id": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526/entities/urn:activity:926134838690697216/activity" }, { "type": "Create", "actor": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526", "object": { "type": "Note", "id": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526/entities/urn:activity:926092616120545280", "attributedTo": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526", "content": "AFTER A BREAK<br /><br />So often when I start reading an article about BDSM it spends a whole paragraph dealing with the importance of finding a good partner to play with. I assume this is like mommy’s advice when we were teenagers – “Only have sex with someone you trust.”<br /><br />When your hormones are raging, and the object of your lust is standing before you, the idea of trust seems a little unnecessary. Or at least something we can think about later – after all, the instinctive mind is in control and we want to satisfy our lust. It’s the intellectual mind that has to deal with the hurt. This is exactly what I want to discuss.<br /><br />Let’s be honest, that properly ‘safe’ person does most likely not exist. Most of us will have difficulty finding them and choosing them. So. What happens when PCD or subdrop hit you in full, not after sex, but after being hurt by a play partner you thought you could trust? Someone you realised you shouldn’t have played with, but only after you did.<br /><br />First up, respect the principles of BDSM. Negotiation, honesty, aftercare, emotional weaknesses. If you have been open in all of your dealings and made an accord, then this is NOT your fault. Communication issues occur, of course, and if we are too squeamish to say what we want or don’t want both parties can be hurt. This is why we proceed slowly. But if you were open and honest from the start, only to have the rules changed on you, this was not your fault.<br /><br />Be your own top now – administer your own aftercare. Tell yourself “You did good” and believe it. Reassure yourself as much as you need.<br /><br />We all know that the two flows of giving and taking exist in sex, and BDSM is play specifically designed to give us both. However, we negotiate for the sake of our emotional health, aligning the instinctual mind with the intellectual. For some of us, the intellectual mind interferes too much to allow us to enjoy certain things. It makes it that much more difficult when an agreement is broken, as we have broken it with ourselves.<br /><br />Both partners should know when to give, when to take, and how much is enough. These boundaries should be clarified both inside sexual scenes and outside the bedroom. Don’t assume anything and be clear about soft and hard limits. <br /><br />What I want to deal with specifically is when the top uses their power OUTSIDE the bedroom in daily life, but not in a scene. For some people the dynamic does follow into daily routines, but I am speaking of when a top makes the sub feel bad for submitting to make themselves feel powerful in a different scenario.<br /><br />Examples<br />“You’re just my sub, you don’t know anything.”<br />“Your submission hasn’t been that great for me.”<br />“I know we negotiated to go no further but I’m not satisfied so you’ll have to.”<br />“You liked it when I called you that last night.”<br />“You just don’t try hard enough.”<br />“Your submission is not enough of a gift to me.”<br /><br />It complicates matters that the top does not act out in a scene. They seem attentive, caring and always prepared to stop and administer aftercare. They most likely know if they do act out in a scene, they would never use the sub again. So, the need to dominate bleeds from the safe area of the scene into daily life where the top can ridicule the sub for other things, calling them into question for no other reason than they have been helpless before them.<br /><br />Dominance and submission, compromise, rule all emotional relationships. We will never have one where these human traits are not at play. Successful relationships negotiate and communicate to form their compromises. The unforgiveable thing here is to bring the subs willing submission into another aspect of life and use it to make the sub less of a person outside of the scene where boundaries and safe words do not exist. <br /><br />This is the line between happy play in a loving relationship and abuse. Its blurry, some of us like it to be a bit blurry. Some of us like it really clear but defined in a way that most relationships would say is out of the norm. <br /><br />So. What to do?<br /><br />As mentioned, administer your own aftercare. Reassure yourself. Negotiate with yourself. The intellectual mind, after agreeing to certain conditions and having them broken, is furious. The instinctual animal that enjoyed the lustful subspace is now terrified and incapable of trust. After giving of itself and being used it descends into betrayal and grief. <br /><br />You brokered a deal behind these two minds once – you can do so again. The intellectual mind has good reason for fury – let it rage. The instinct has reason to fear – let it scream. But let them not rage and scream AT EACH OTHER, no. Bring them together.<br /><br />Be kind to yourself. Feel the fear and the rage. Understand exactly why you are afraid and angry. Feel your emotions, don’t invalidate them or let anyone else do so either.<br /><br />It can be helpful to communicate to the person who hurt you in a calm and reasonable manner. I know this won’t always be possible but once you have fully understood your own feelings being able to tell the top how you feel can help free you from the mental images and your willing participation in them. <br /><br />Do not expect anything from the other person. They can’t ‘fix’ it. They may not be sorry or even feel they should be. Telling them how you feel is not about wounding them or getting a reaction, only clearing your own heart. If we can’t accept how they react, at least accept that their reaction is not personal to you. <br /><br />Something clear, well thought out and honest.<br /><br />“I did this. You did this. I let you do this. At the time, I thought it was love and I was safe. Now I am angry and afraid because I feel you have taken advantage of me – that you lied so you could use my body, then proved you were never genuine in wanting it by hurting me emotionally afterwards. I feel betrayed I gave so much, and it meant so little to you. After I let myself be so helpless, so vulnerable, just for you, I felt it was impossible you could hurt me in any way.”<br /><br />I say again. Don’t expect anything of the other person. Their path is their own.<br /><br />Protect yourself. Keep instinct and intellect in good accord. Give yourself time. Time to heal, for the wounds to fade. Don’t rush. As with all things that wound the soul through the heart, just take one small step away from it, a day at a time. <br />", "to": [ "https://www.w3.org/ns/activitystreams#Public" ], "cc": [ "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526/followers" ], "tag": [], "url": "https://www.minds.com/newsfeed/926092616120545280", "published": "2018-12-30T12:41:25+00:00", "source": { "content": "AFTER A BREAK\n\nSo often when I start reading an article about BDSM it spends a whole paragraph dealing with the importance of finding a good partner to play with. I assume this is like mommy’s advice when we were teenagers – “Only have sex with someone you trust.”\n\nWhen your hormones are raging, and the object of your lust is standing before you, the idea of trust seems a little unnecessary. Or at least something we can think about later – after all, the instinctive mind is in control and we want to satisfy our lust. It’s the intellectual mind that has to deal with the hurt. This is exactly what I want to discuss.\n\nLet’s be honest, that properly ‘safe’ person does most likely not exist. Most of us will have difficulty finding them and choosing them. So. What happens when PCD or subdrop hit you in full, not after sex, but after being hurt by a play partner you thought you could trust? Someone you realised you shouldn’t have played with, but only after you did.\n\nFirst up, respect the principles of BDSM. Negotiation, honesty, aftercare, emotional weaknesses. If you have been open in all of your dealings and made an accord, then this is NOT your fault. Communication issues occur, of course, and if we are too squeamish to say what we want or don’t want both parties can be hurt. This is why we proceed slowly. But if you were open and honest from the start, only to have the rules changed on you, this was not your fault.\n\nBe your own top now – administer your own aftercare. Tell yourself “You did good” and believe it. Reassure yourself as much as you need.\n\nWe all know that the two flows of giving and taking exist in sex, and BDSM is play specifically designed to give us both. However, we negotiate for the sake of our emotional health, aligning the instinctual mind with the intellectual. For some of us, the intellectual mind interferes too much to allow us to enjoy certain things. It makes it that much more difficult when an agreement is broken, as we have broken it with ourselves.\n\nBoth partners should know when to give, when to take, and how much is enough. These boundaries should be clarified both inside sexual scenes and outside the bedroom. Don’t assume anything and be clear about soft and hard limits. \n\nWhat I want to deal with specifically is when the top uses their power OUTSIDE the bedroom in daily life, but not in a scene. For some people the dynamic does follow into daily routines, but I am speaking of when a top makes the sub feel bad for submitting to make themselves feel powerful in a different scenario.\n\nExamples\n“You’re just my sub, you don’t know anything.”\n“Your submission hasn’t been that great for me.”\n“I know we negotiated to go no further but I’m not satisfied so you’ll have to.”\n“You liked it when I called you that last night.”\n“You just don’t try hard enough.”\n“Your submission is not enough of a gift to me.”\n\nIt complicates matters that the top does not act out in a scene. They seem attentive, caring and always prepared to stop and administer aftercare. They most likely know if they do act out in a scene, they would never use the sub again. So, the need to dominate bleeds from the safe area of the scene into daily life where the top can ridicule the sub for other things, calling them into question for no other reason than they have been helpless before them.\n\nDominance and submission, compromise, rule all emotional relationships. We will never have one where these human traits are not at play. Successful relationships negotiate and communicate to form their compromises. The unforgiveable thing here is to bring the subs willing submission into another aspect of life and use it to make the sub less of a person outside of the scene where boundaries and safe words do not exist. \n\nThis is the line between happy play in a loving relationship and abuse. Its blurry, some of us like it to be a bit blurry. Some of us like it really clear but defined in a way that most relationships would say is out of the norm. \n\nSo. What to do?\n\nAs mentioned, administer your own aftercare. Reassure yourself. Negotiate with yourself. The intellectual mind, after agreeing to certain conditions and having them broken, is furious. The instinctual animal that enjoyed the lustful subspace is now terrified and incapable of trust. After giving of itself and being used it descends into betrayal and grief. \n\nYou brokered a deal behind these two minds once – you can do so again. The intellectual mind has good reason for fury – let it rage. The instinct has reason to fear – let it scream. But let them not rage and scream AT EACH OTHER, no. Bring them together.\n\nBe kind to yourself. Feel the fear and the rage. Understand exactly why you are afraid and angry. Feel your emotions, don’t invalidate them or let anyone else do so either.\n\nIt can be helpful to communicate to the person who hurt you in a calm and reasonable manner. I know this won’t always be possible but once you have fully understood your own feelings being able to tell the top how you feel can help free you from the mental images and your willing participation in them. \n\nDo not expect anything from the other person. They can’t ‘fix’ it. They may not be sorry or even feel they should be. Telling them how you feel is not about wounding them or getting a reaction, only clearing your own heart. If we can’t accept how they react, at least accept that their reaction is not personal to you. \n\nSomething clear, well thought out and honest.\n\n“I did this. You did this. I let you do this. At the time, I thought it was love and I was safe. Now I am angry and afraid because I feel you have taken advantage of me – that you lied so you could use my body, then proved you were never genuine in wanting it by hurting me emotionally afterwards. I feel betrayed I gave so much, and it meant so little to you. After I let myself be so helpless, so vulnerable, just for you, I felt it was impossible you could hurt me in any way.”\n\nI say again. Don’t expect anything of the other person. Their path is their own.\n\nProtect yourself. Keep instinct and intellect in good accord. Give yourself time. Time to heal, for the wounds to fade. Don’t rush. As with all things that wound the soul through the heart, just take one small step away from it, a day at a time. \n", "mediaType": "text/plain" } }, "id": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526/entities/urn:activity:926092616120545280/activity" }, { "type": "Create", "actor": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526", "object": { "type": "Note", "id": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526/entities/urn:activity:926056751247798272", "attributedTo": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526", "content": "Well my darlings, since we aren't allowed to have sex on either Facebook or Tumblr it looks like this will be the main page. I have been distracted by the holidays but articles are coming soon. I'd like to go through the ties I have done so far, both practically, aesthetically and sexually. I have developed a very strong connection with rope and this will be woven into my tantric practise. ", "to": [ "https://www.w3.org/ns/activitystreams#Public" ], "cc": [ "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526/followers" ], "tag": [], "url": "https://www.minds.com/newsfeed/926056751247798272", "published": "2018-12-30T10:18:54+00:00", "source": { "content": "Well my darlings, since we aren't allowed to have sex on either Facebook or Tumblr it looks like this will be the main page. I have been distracted by the holidays but articles are coming soon. I'd like to go through the ties I have done so far, both practically, aesthetically and sexually. I have developed a very strong connection with rope and this will be woven into my tantric practise. ", "mediaType": "text/plain" } }, "id": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526/entities/urn:activity:926056751247798272/activity" }, { "type": "Create", "actor": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526", "object": { "type": "Note", "id": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526/entities/urn:activity:919098805664550912", "attributedTo": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526", "content": "<a href=\"https://youtu.be/KirLD9vPeOQ\" target=\"_blank\">https://youtu.be/KirLD9vPeOQ</a>", "to": [ "https://www.w3.org/ns/activitystreams#Public" ], "cc": [ "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526/followers" ], "tag": [], "url": "https://www.minds.com/newsfeed/919098805664550912", "published": "2018-12-11T05:30:31+00:00", "source": { "content": "https://youtu.be/KirLD9vPeOQ", "mediaType": "text/plain" } }, "id": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526/entities/urn:activity:919098805664550912/activity" }, { "type": "Create", "actor": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526", "object": { "type": "Note", "id": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526/entities/urn:activity:918288402330963968", "attributedTo": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526", "content": "Since the mighty Tumblr has fallen I'll be picking up back here again", "to": [ "https://www.w3.org/ns/activitystreams#Public" ], "cc": [ "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526/followers" ], "tag": [], "url": "https://www.minds.com/newsfeed/918288402330963968", "published": "2018-12-08T23:50:15+00:00", "source": { "content": "Since the mighty Tumblr has fallen I'll be picking up back here again", "mediaType": "text/plain" } }, "id": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526/entities/urn:activity:918288402330963968/activity" } ], "id": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526/outbox", "partOf": "https://www.minds.com/api/activitypub/users/719797309218496526/outboxoutbox" }